Writing

Keepin it up! I said I'd write on here every day but I never promised they'd be long posts.

Saw two more fringe shows today, the second one specifically was fantastic, definitely recommended. I might write about it tomorrow...

Stumbled across this short film online today as well — also a good watch if you've got 15 minutes to spare.

Some vague thoughts for today:

I think the energy that drives me to be scared or sad or self-destructive is the same energy that I put towards writing/art-making. I'm not super great at talking about my feelings to other people, and I think I'm also not so great at directly defining them for myself in a way that makes sense to me. Creating things has always been how I funnel that energy into something positive (or at least somewhat productive), and I think it's also the only way I'm able expel certain things from myself without having to have them perfectly understood or articulated first. Playwriting, for example, is this weird thing where I'm able to explore stuff I'm feeling or thinking about without really knowing what I'm doing. I'm not sure if any of that makes sense, but often I'll go back and read something I'd written months ago and realize only in retrospect what it was that I was working through at the time. It's not like I sit down beforehand and go "I'm gonna write this thing about Theme A". I just start writing, and only afterwards am I able to look at it and go "hey, looks like I was writing about Theme A".

I often have difficulty (as with most things, to be honest) explaining this to other people, but it all has something to do with how I write because I have to. I write because if I didn't I'm pretty sure I'd explode.